Yoongi
*Three days later*
These three days have been hectic and crazy. Namjoon decided to that we should move to another one of Bangtan’s properties since the house’ location and security were compromised. He did not want to take any risks, especially because of his wife and son.
Meanwhile, there have been cleaning arrangements at the old house. Namjoon is planning on selling it to the government so that it will eventually turn into an orphanage. At least, the house would not be wasted and someone will benefit from it. Still, that will be a long process.
Unfortunately, we lost four of our men as well in the fight. Four men that I had grown up with and cared for as family. Of course, everyone felt their deaths as we held the funeral for them on the next day.
As for yesterday, we held the funeral for Yeonjun’s and Cherry’s parents. I still can’t shake off the image of what I saw when I went to their house. I had gone with Jungkook, Jimin and Taehyung to check on them as soon as Namjoon told us what that * told her.
We knew what to expect, having been told she most likely slit their throats. When we had arrived, the house was quiet and eerie but the bad smell of death was already pretty strong.
I’ve seen a lot of horrible things in my life but what I saw there made my stomach feel queasy and I heard Jungkook rush out to throw up. Both parents were on the ground, drowned in a puddle of their own blood. From the first glance, we could tell they had been tortured too.
Yesterday, during the funeral, I kept my eyes on their kids. Yeonjun was seated since he was still injured. The poor kid needed stitches on his side and his arm was a sling, his hand had been broken in several places. His face was bruised and his right eye black and swollen. He had tried not to cry until Jin hugged him, almost as if to reassure him it was okay to cry.
As for Cherry, she stood at the back, a stoic look on her face. Her shoulder and arm were both bandaged and her step was not as quick as usual. Her body must have been tired as was her mind. Still, I could not even begin to read her. Her face was completely emotionless – not a single tear. I worried about her – knowing her relationship with her parents was messy. Her father had given her to the Scarlets to keep his family safe but she still cared for them, even if she tried to keep it in.
After the funeral was ready, she disappeared and she still has not come back home. I knew everyone else was also worried as no one was really paying much attention at the meeting that Namjoon was holding.
I heard him sigh before he stood up and went to the cabinet and brought the whiskey bottle. He poured a drink for himself and then passed on the bottle to Hoseok who scoffed but poured a drink anyways.
‘I really don’t like the idea of Cherry being on her own. What if she is targeted again?’ Jimin asked with clear worry as he tapped his fingers against the wooden table. I frowned as I recalled what happened last time. Last time – she had been caught by Rosa and tortured until we managed to find her.
‘I’m worried about that but Cherry, she spent over a year living in the shadows. She knows how to hide well and if she doesn’t want to be found, she won’t,’ Taehyung said.
‘I wish I could kill Rosa all over again for everything that * made Cherry go through,’ Hoseok spat angrily, his grip on the glass tightening so much his knuckles were turning white.
His face was hard and set and the vein on his neck seemed to almost bulge out. I knew that Hoseok was livid about what happened to her parents. After all, he knows what losing family is like. I also knew that beneath the anger there was also worry, a lot of worry.
‘Where do you think she might be?’ Jungkook asked as he reached for the whiskey bottle.
Namjoon shrugged as he took a sip from his glass. ‘Who knows? Maybe she just needs some time on her own,’ Namjoon said.
‘God knows I would need it after all that. The fight at the hospital, then the ring, Rosa coming here, her parents. It would be too much for anyone,’ Jin said, shaking his head.
‘I’m more worried about the fact that she is just burying her emotions deep inside her, not letting it out. It’s not healthy,’ I said and I saw Hoseok nod.
‘I’m worried about that too. She’s been taught and trained to see emotions as weakness, as something that hinders her, but she was slowly letting down her walls. I worry that this will make her build them all up again,’ Hoseok said, clearly frustrated.
‘You guys did not see the look on her face when Rosa told her men to bring Yeonjun out. There was the look of pure heartbreak and worry,’ Namjoon said.
‘At first, I was not sure why she was pushing Yeonjun away so much. I thought it was related to the idea of him being chosen over her, but I think it was more fear,’ Jimin said.
‘Definitely,’ I said as I took a sip from my glass. ‘She was afraid of attaching herself to him and of letting Scarlets know about him. She was doing it to protect him,’ I said and Namjoon nodded.
‘She definitely loves her brother a lot. Why else would she risk staying alone with Rosa just so that I could take him out?’ he said, downing the rest of his drink. ‘It’s almost funny, her brother was also more concerned about her,’ he said with a small smile.
‘Two peas in a pod. They’re even more similar than they realize,’ Jimin said with a soft smile.
‘Do you think he will have a full recovery hyung?’ Taehyung asked turning to Jin who nodded. ‘Thank goodness. I love that kid. He’s honest and full of energy and enthusiasm and truly a good person. He did not deserve this,’ he said with a sigh.
‘No one does,’ Hoseok said as he played with his phone. ‘Yoongi, do you think you’d be able to track her?’ Hoseok asked and I sighed.
‘Possibly but she knows how to hide well Hoseok and in all honesty, I think we need to give her space to come to terms with it,’ I said and he nodded but I knew he was not satisfied.
‘I just hope she’s safe,’ Jimin muttered and I nodded as well.
Cherry
I was sitting down in front of the fireplace of the old, abandoned house that I liked to come hide in every now and then.
During the year that I was on my own, always on the run, I used to come here often. I basically knew this house upside down. I knew every room and every picture in this forgotten house where a murder had taken place long, ago.
For a year, it had been my sanctuary – a place solely my own. A place I could hide and rest – a break from being hunted like an animal. Now, a place for me to deal with my demons as I emptied another bottle of vodka or whatever alcohol I was drinking.
I laughed to myself as I held the letter that Yoongi had found in the house. It seemed this letter was written before Rosa went to them, a little after Yeonjun had told them he found me.
They had wanted to meet but I had refused. I had not felt ready and now … now I did not even have the chance to make amends. I looked at the letter in my hands as I took a deep breath and started to read it again.
Dearest Haneul,
You might be surprised to be reading this letter from us. I … I don’t know how many times we’ve tried to start it but stopped, crumbled the paper and began again. We do not seem to be able to find the right words but how can we? What words could possibly be right?
How can we find the right words when we failed you… or rather, when I failed you? Your poor mother did not have much of a choice. She barely knew what was really going on but at the time, even if my heart broke, I thought I was making the right decision by giving you up so all four of us could live.
Yeonjun, he told us he found, he finally found you. God, we cannot begin to describe how we felt to know you were alive and okay. He told us that you left the Scarlets because you refused to kill innocent people and I guess a part of us feels relieved to know you have not been lost. Yet, our hearts break at what you must have gone through.
He told us how you’ve grown into a beautiful, strong, independent woman and he even brought us your picture. You really are beautiful and I could say you’re a carbon copy of your mother but your mother says you’re more beautiful. I don’t know. For me, you’re the two most beautiful women in the whole wide world.
Yet, all we keep seeing in front of our eyes is the little girl we lost. I keep thinking of that fateful night as you cried for me while I let them take you. There is not a day that I do not regret what I have done. There is no night that I lay awake at night and think of how different things could have been.
We can only hope that you forgive us. We know right now you do not wish to see us. You may never want to see us and as much as it breaks our hearts, it is okay our precious daughter. We understand it is not easy for you.
I guess, we are writing this letter in case something ever happens. We do not blame you for not talking to us. We’re even more grateful that Yeonjun said you do not hate us. It’s more than what we, or rather, I deserve.
I beg of you to not blame Yeonjun though. For the last couple of years, he has been trying to find you and now that he has found you, he’s the happiest I have ever seen him. He adores you Haneul and he will never let you down.
Haneul, I hope one day we get to see you but if we don’t, know that we love you. Know that we adore you and that we will always be with you. We love you so much and we hope you can find it in your heart to forgive us.
Always yours,
Your Appa and Eomma
I shuddered as I folded the paper back in four and put it in my pocket. I took back the bottle of vodka and took a couple of sips before I laid down, staring at the old ceiling, hoping I can fall asleep.
Barely five minutes later, my phone rang. I sat back up with a groan as I looked at my phone, only to realize it’s a message from Hoseok.
Hoseok: Come outside.
I stared at the phone for a moment before it vibrated again and a new message popped up.
Hoseok; I’m right outside. Come out!
I smiled slightly as I wobbled to my feet. I managed to straighten up, the vodka bottle still in hand as I made myself outside to the porch. I saw him sitting on the steps there as he turned to look at me. His eyes went to my bottle and he frowned.
‘What are you doing here Hoseok?’ I said and I could have cringed at how cold that came out. He smiled a little as he tilted his head.
‘Why are you drinking alone?’ he asked and I shrugged. ‘Come sit next to me,’ he said and I listened, almost as if I am a little girl. ‘You know, it’s rude not to share, especially with your guests,’ he said.
I rolled my eyes as I handed him the vodka bottle. He took a couple of sips before he handed it back to me. ‘Satisfied?’ I asked.
‘Just starting,’ he said before he sighed sadly. ‘Are you okay?’ he asked and I shrugged.
‘Of course. Why wouldn’t I be?’ I asked as I took a few more sips. ‘I know my parents just got murdered but I had not seen them for half of my life. I don’t care,’ I said, drinking some more.
‘Sure. That’s why you disappeared and why you’re drinking,’ he said sarcastically.
‘I’m drinking because I felt like it,’ I said with a shrug. He sighed as he shook his head.
‘It’s okay to cry you know?’ he asked and I scoffed. ‘I’m serious. Crying won’t make you weak or whatever nonsense the Scarlets put in your head,’ he said.
‘Crying won’t bring them back, will it?’ I snapped at him. He sighed once more as he ran his hand through his hair.
‘No, I guess not,’ he said as he remained quiet. I felt guilty for snapping at him so I turned to look at him. He was looking at the stars, his face soft right now.
‘Sorry for snapping at you,’ I mumble. He chuckled slightly but shrugged.
‘It’s okay. It happens,’ he said and I nodded. ‘So, this is your go to place huh?’ he asked as he reached for my bottle so he can take a sip.
‘When I was on the run, that one year I was being hunted, I used to come here often. It’s abandoned and forgotten and I could spend days here to get a proper rest when I was too tired,’ I said. ‘How did you even find me Hobi?’ I asked.
‘I asked Yoongi to trace you. At first, he wasn’t so sure but I kept bugging him. It did help that he was torn himself between giving you space but also being worried about you,’ he said and I nodded.
‘Okay so he was worried. What about you? Why are you here?’ I asked as I took back the bottle and drank some more.
‘I um… I wanted to make sure you’re okay and if you’re not okay, at least you won’t be alone. I think you’ve been alone for too long,’ he said and I nodded as I took a sip.
‘Thank you Hobi,’ I said as I shuddered from the cold. He sighed as he stood up and presented me his hand.
‘You’re cold. Let’s go inside,’ he said. I smiled as I gave him my hand and let him help me up. He led me inside as we both went to the couch, in front of the fireplace.
‘Shouldn’t you be resting at home Hobi?’ I asked but he shrugged.
‘And leave the princess alone?’ he asked, teasing me. ‘You’re exhausted Hanuel,’ he said as he put his arm around me. ‘Did you even sleep these two days?’ he asked and I shrugged.
‘I couldn’t,’ I admitted. ‘Nightmares were too much,’ I added and he nodded.
‘Well, now I’m here. Come on, lay down on me and rest,’ he said. I followed his instructions as we both shifted on the couch so we could lay down. I put my head on his warm chest while he wrapped his arm around me, securing me in place, making sure I don’t end up falling.
I felt myself slowly going to sleep and I could not help myself but snuggle closer to him. He felt warm. He felt safe. I heard him chuckle before I fell asleep.
